Category Archives: Faith

A simple, fun Family Home Evening – Makes Me Happy

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Our lives lately have swirled into a little black hole where our normal lives don’t exist. It’s extremely frustrating when this happens, because we become accustomed to this new black hole.

I woke up today and said to myself – I AM SNAPPING OUT OF IT! I am going to get back into my housekeeping schedule, my work schedule, and Sunday I’m going to church. Well, since tonight was Monday I decided the first step in getting back to normal is to do {Family Home Evening}

Something we haven’t done in a while, and something that is much needed not only in our home, but everyone’s home. Please click on the link that the words Family Home Evening gave to read about it, or under my topics click on FHE.

Tonight’s Family Home Evening, since being the first in while, I made it extremely simple… and fun. I made {Rich Dark Chocolate Fudge Sauce} in my adorable {Wildtree Fondue Set} and we sat around the table dipping strawberries and took turns saying…. “so and so (somebody sitting at the table) makes me happy when….” and then we say what makes us happy.

Some of Jayden’s responses: “Ella makes me happy when she makes a big mess.” “Ella makes me happy when she screams” I’m starting to think he didn’t get it LOL… but he had some good ones in there too like, “Mama makes me happy when she hugs me.”

We had laughs, the chocolate dipped strawberries were delicious and there’s another Family Home Evening memory that will stick with my kids in their hearts. Another Family Home Evening that will keep us as a family strong.

My goal from here on out is to make sure that I do Family Home Evening every, single Monday – no matter how hectic the day has been. This is something my family needs, even if it’s 10 minutes of sharing a few laughs, without the TV and a delicious treat.

My Testimony… Mine.

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I have been working on building my testimony in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I struggle with many things, but what this church believes in is definitely not one of them. There are things I don’t understand completely, or seem a little extreme to me, but I just accept it and never question it.

On Testimony Sunday I hear of people bearing their testimony and I think it’s so neat that they can feel so strong about basically everything in the church. I’m beginning to realize that I can’t base my testimony on the testimony of others. I need to develop my own testimony and I need it to be through my own experiences, through my own scripture study and because I felt it on my own.

I have a very strong testimony of the Holy Ghost. I believe that the Holy Ghost will come to you in times of need no matter where you’re at in your life. I believe that the Holy Ghost will comfort you through times of trial even when you’re not being the most perfect person. I’ve talked a few times before about my baby girl, Mya. Halfway through my pregnancy her heart stopped and for a while after we lost her I kept feeling this feeling inside of me that I couldn’t explain. It was a feeling of comfort that I had never felt before. I told myself that it was Mya. Her spirit was staying behind with me to comfort me. As much as I wish that were the case I now believe that it was the Holy Ghost. I believe that I was wrapped up in its arms and stayed that way until it knew that I was okay. I remember waking up one day to not feeling that feeling anymore. I was sad, because in my heart I thought she’s gone but that wasn’t the case. She was gone the whole time….. the Holy Ghost had been there to do its job and it did…. and that is one blessing I am grateful to have in my life.

I have a VERY strong testimony of prayer. I believe that if you pray sincerely that what is to be will be. I also believe that we can make our lives what we want, and we can do this through prayer. It says in the bible in both Matthew & Luke that if you ask and believe that you have already received it you will receive it. This is hard for some people, but it’s not hard for me. You just have to have faith, and while faith is a hard thing to grasp and walk with – it’s what we need to have.

I haven’t had an opportunity to learn a lot about the things I should know. During church I have the privilege of chasing my busy toddler around the halls. Sometimes I wish she’d just cooperate and go into nursery, but the fact that she still wants her mommy is soothing to my soul, so it’s okay. It’s okay to miss out on all of the stuff I need to know for now, because for now she needs me.

I have a strong testimony of Family Home Evening. Having that one night that is a guarantee in our home every Monday is vital. It’s vital for me as a mom and it is vital for my children. They need to know that they have a strong family, and every week that we hold this for them, our family will only grow more and more stronger.

Right now, this is all I’ve got. I know it isn’t much, but it’s more than some. It’s what I know to be true in my heart. I only hope that my testimony will grow stronger and stronger. I hope that I can get back into daily scripture reading and implement a family scripture reading everyday as well.

While I’m not ready to get up and bear my testimony, I’m sharing it with my friends here. I know that in all due time it all will come to me, but for now this is what I’m holding onto.

It’s for us… and in our own way we’ll get there

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Normally on Sundays we awake early and get dressed up to attend church. It’s become a regular thing and something we feel is extremely important for our children.

Today is week 3 of no church for us. Week #1 was Mother’s Day and I was enjoying a very relaxing weekend on the Oregon Coast, Week #2 my sister was up visiting and we spent the day taking pictures at Lithia Park (still being edited) and this week I think my daughter has bronchitis… and my throat hurts.

The problem here is every Sunday you spend away from church you fall more and more away from it. Truthfully, a part of me really wasn’t in the mood to attend church this morning, and that makes me feel bad. I don’t know what I should be doing to ensure that my family stays strong is something I believe to be true. Yet, I don’t want to feel guilty for not always doing everything perfect… and that’s a problem that I have. I walk into church and look at all the “perfect” forever families and almost feel intimidated. I shouldn’t, because I bet they have problems too, I bet they struggle with insecurities, I bet they’re not as perfect as they seem. But this has been their life for all of their lives… and if not all of their lives, a good part of them. This is new to us. Some Sundays I’d rather go shopping and enjoy the beautiful day that my husband has off together and not spend 3 hours in a church…. yet, that feeling right there makes me feel guilty.

I’m coming to a realization that this is for us. We have to take this at a pace that feels right for us and if that means we’re going to skip a Sunday to lay around and catch up on Desperate Housewives, I guess that’s what we have to do. I’m always too worried about what other people are thinking…’OMG the Garibays are inactive’. We’re not. Our faith is just as strong now as it ever was. We’re not out partying and drinking, we’re still following the commandments, it’s just a life changing thing for us. Sometimes we actually feel uncomfortable and I wish it wasn’t that way, but it is. I feel like the members of our ward are on one level and we’re on another. This is something I’ll have to work out on my own, but in the meantime I’m coming to the realization that this is for us. It’s not about the Bishop, it’s not about the people, it’s not even about the socialization part of it all, it’s about and for us.

If there’s a Sunday I want to go and Gino doesn’t, there’s not going to be anymore guilt trips and disappointment, because when I get home from church he’s still there, he still believes in it, he still loves me and that’s good enough for me… plus, I’m sure the next week he’ll be sitting right next to me.

Being Thankful

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Do you ever wake up in the morning happy to be awake early? Happy to be alive? Looking forward to all of the days activities…. even if it’s just about getting housework done? This has been me for the past couple of days. It’s weird.

I get excited when I wake up and can’t wait to start living. I’ve been more enjoyable to be around, not complaining and nagging, or getting frustrated with my husband and children.

I’ve been trying to stay positive and look at the wonderful things about my life. I don’t focus on what I don’t have, I’ve been focusing on what I do have. Ella might be a pill (like at church today) but it’s okay, because she’s here…. alive. She could be dead. Yes, quite morbid, but she did almost die as a newborn and instead of getting all stressed out, I am starting to appreciate the fact that I do have a toddler here with me to throw a fit. Her fits can be like music to my ears, because it could be like Mya. I never got to hear her throw a fit, or laugh, or have her pull my hair. I have gotten to the point where I understand why she’s gone. I have accepted it. She died so Ella could be here. In my heart I know that we will all be together one day. One day I will get to meet Mya and I will thank her for allowing me to have Ella in my life. Without Mya dying there would be no Ella. That is my positive outlook on losing Mya. It took me a long time to get there, but I’m there. I’m at peace.

I often times get overwhelmed with all of the tasks that I have to complete. Well, instead of letting these tasks overwhelm me I’m trying to be thankful for the fact that I am able to stay home and have these tasks. I could be working out of my home and not be able to see my children until 5:30pm at night. Thankfully, I spend every waking moment with Ella and with Jayden when he’s out of school. I am thankful for that. I am thankful that I put my mind to being able to become a work at home mom and I did it. I want to be here for my children. I want to be the one who raises them, and I cannot express how much gratitude I have.

Being thankful isn’t something that is so easily done. You have to actually think about these things and realize the many tiny, little things in life that you don’t realize are so wonderful. The fact that I have running water, food ALWAYS on my table, a husband that is my best friend, and children who are loving and a son that has more respect than I’ve ever seen in a boy. These little things about life make me smile and feel overwhelmed with thanks.

When you feel like your life is out of control and there’s a million reasons why you hate your life, you should stop and make a list of all the things you love about your life, the things you’re thankful for…. even the small things. Focus on those things, and make your life what you want it to be…. paint your own picture. That is what I have been doing and I’m very thankful for it all.

Life for us….

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Life in the Garibay home has been a bit different lately. There are things that have happened that I can’t yet discuss on my blog due to privacy issues (I’m not sure who reads it!!)

I will say this… I’m exhausted, sad and I just hope that everything turns out the way God intends it too. This doesn’t have much to do with our immediate family, but is effecting it. Not in a bad way 🙂 So… basically, life has changed a bit and will remained changed for probably a couple of weeks… maybe longer who knows.

Today is General Conference and I’m anxiously awaiting to see what guidance is passed down to us today. I know a lot of people will gather at the church today to watch the words of our prophet and advisers, but I will happily be watching at home with a pause button…. something much needed with kids!!!

Our Family’s New Addition…. and I need advice :)

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Here’s Sophie!! She’s such a sweet addition 🙂

What a Sunday. It started for me at 5am waking up to Sophie pooping in her crate…. me not knowing, because it’s dark and letting her walk out of the crate instead of carrying her. It was gross, and made me want to cry, but we dealt with it.

She’s honestly done pretty well today on going to the bathroom outside…. I’m pretty proud! I must say though that dogs have HORRIFIC GAS! EWWWWWWWW!!!!!!! The kids have been having an absolute ball with her. They all run around the house chasing each other and having fun. Ella is hilarious and Jayden is so happy.

So, I’m funny in a way that I don’t like change. I hate it actually, and when you throw something new in the mix I feel kinda down. I’m feeling that way today and I’m not sure if it’s Sophie or if it’s a decision that I think we’re going to make. It actually could be a mixture of the 2.

A while ago I talked about an opportunity that my Grandma had offered us, which you can read about HERE. Basically I just never talked about it with her and made up my mind that it’s not doable. There’s no way in hell that I’m going to live in a *&it hole like Ely for 2 years. Just not happening. Well, she called today saying that she really needs our help, and I know this. I am the manager of this mobile home park there that is her’s, and I know that there are many things that need to get done. Things that I can’t make sure are getting done from Oregon. So, her new proposal is that we come for 6 months. This is a lot better than 2 years and is actually doable. If we leave when Jayden gets out of school then 3 months of that will be summer, in which we can take lots of little vacations with him. I won’t need to actually be in Ely for the entire 6 months, we can do 3 weeks there, 1 week on the road…. or something like that. The next 3 months after his summer break I’ll home school him until we return to Talent.

So, what’s my husband to do about work when this is all over? What are we going to do about insurance since I do have a Cardiac baby? This is why 6 months just might be okay. Gino can take a leave of absence from Home Depot for up to 6 months (I believe this is the max he’s going to check into this). At the end of our journey he will be guaranteed his job back at Home Depot, with no change in position or pay. Nice huh? For insurance we just pay Cobra and we will all remained medically insured.

The Perks?

  1. We get a 6 month vacation from life with guaranteed jobs after we’re done.
  2. Get to live for free
  3. All money I get paid just gets saved up
  4. We get to travel
  5. I get to spend time with my Great-grandma before she passes away
  6. Did I mention we get to travel????
  7. We will get to help my Grandma out in ensuring that the park is running smoothly and looking it’s best.
  8. We’d get to take the kids to the Salt Lake Temple…. Gino definitley needs to see that!
  9. All the above isn’t too bad right?

The Downfalls?

  1. Well, first off I’d be leaving all my friends that I’ve learned to love so much.
  2. I’d be leaving the beauty of Southern Oregon
  3. I would miss out on the first 2 1/2-3 months of my nephew’s life
  4. I’d be in the miserable town of Ely
  5. We’d have to change wards, which is something I really don’t want to do, but I think we’d be okay here. We are a very strong family, we’ve been through it all…. literally, and I know that we can make it through about anything. I know that we can stay strong in the church, and if Gino has issues with it I’ll just stay strong and set the best example I can.
  6. Jayden would miss out on the first month of school…. luckily here they don’t start school until September, so if we came back in October I’d only be homeschooling him for a month.

I think we might do it. We’ve been planning on moving out of this place anyways, since we’re growing out of it. So, in June we can leave and come back in October to a new home…. maybe even one we’ll own 🙂

I had amazing feedback on my last post regarding this topic, and I appreciate it all so much, so I’m begging for some here! Looking at the perks and downfalls, would we be dumb not to do this?

My Sunday Message on Faith

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Normally on Sundays I like to come on and write something inspirational that touched me at church. Unfortunately, I didn’t get anything out of church today. Ella had a meltdown during nursery and Gino got a migraine so we left early.

However, I thought I might as well share some sortof message that has inspired me. It made me feel better and strengthened my faith in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. We believe that after you die you go to spirit prison if you have not had a chance to hear the gospel, to accept the gospel, or know anything about the gospel. The thought of that sounds horrible, but I’ve learned that it’s a place that the spirits go and they are given a chance to learn about the gospel. They receive a second chance to accept these teachings. I’m not sure if other religions believe this, but when I find little “nuggets” as my bishop calls them in the bible I get really excited. I found a scripture that talks about how Jesus went to preach the gospel to the spirits in prison. You can read that in 1 Peter 3:19

One thing I know is that Heavenly Father is loving. He loves us all and does not want us to suffer. He gives us chance after chance and continually forgives us for the sins that we do unto others. Do we always forgive others for the sins that they do unto us? No. And that is something that we most definitely should learn how to do. Forgiving isn’t easy, but it is necessary if you want to be forgiven for your sins. We get a second chance and others should too!

Peace – It has to start with me

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I had a wonderful day at church today. It’s been a couple of weeks since we’ve gone thanks to our trip and the flu. Even before all that, we were going off and on due to illnesses and another trip to Sacramento, and I’m so relieved that I have nothing planned and will be attending as far as I know every Sunday.

Ella went to nursery. She still isn’t doing very well in there, but she was in there for most of the time. I got a good 20 minutes of sitting in Relief Society and I am so thankful for the 20 minutes that I did get in there. I have no idea what the lesson was on, but I got a message that touched me. It’s a song, I believe, and it goes like this…..

Let there be peace on earth
And let it begin with me.
Let there be peace on earth
The peace that was meant to be
As God is our father
Children all are we.
Let us walk with each other
In perfect harmony.

Let peace begin with me
Let this be the moment now.
With every step I take
Let this be my solemn vow.
To take each moment
And live each moment
With peace eternally.
Let there be peace on earth,
And let it begin with me.

I’m not at peace. I have anxiety, at times I feel my temper is short, and this is something I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to work on. Having peace in my life, and having it start with me. This is a very difficult thing for me, because I don’t think I’m in any way a peaceful person, but I want to be.

I want to be that person that people look at and say… wow, what makes her so peaceful and graceful. It can’t happen over night, but I definitely want to work on having peace within myself.

Here is how I think I can accomplish having peace:

Get my home in perfect order. Perfect is a very strong word, but I need it to be darn close to it. I worked a lot on this today and am very pleased with what I accomplished. I have a goal of having the entire house in perfect order by Friday… excluding the garage. This is a very easy goal to accomplish… it might not be PERFECT, but it will be in order and I need that.

Reading my scriptures every single day. I am TERRIBLE at this. I want to start my day out by reading a message through scripture reading and I want to end my day by reading a message through scripture reading.

I need to get routines and schedules going in my home. Sometimes it’s chaotic and stressful, and it shouldn’t be. We need set bedtimes, set homework times, set bath times… I think it would bring peace in our home.

For me, I’m going to start doing Yoga once a week and make it a point to set aside time every evening to take a relaxing bath with a good book. Ever mom needs time away.

So, this all starts with me.

If you have ideas of things that could bring peace within yourself, please let me know.

The Secret Life of Bees

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I just closed this book after reading the final page and was compelled to run to my blog to talk about it. What a powerful story. This book was so satisfying and is up there as one of my favorites. If you haven’t read it, I HIGHLY suggest it.

Forgiveness. It was mentioned in the book that people would rather die than forgive. Forgiving is a VERY difficult thing to do, but it is also something that we are supposed to do. Matthew 6:14-15 it states For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your Heavenly Father will will also forgive you: But if ye forgive men not their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. I don’t know about you, but I definitely know that there are many things that I’ve done wrong, and I most definitely hope that one day I will be forgiven for those things. It is hard to forgive, but it’s necessary. We’re all human, we’re not perfect, we make mistakes. Your entire past could be a mistake and full of wrong doing, but you can definitely say your prayers, repent, and try to change your ways. Try to make the best of the rest of your time on earth. It’s never too late, and it’s not right to make other’s suffer that are in need of YOUR forgiveness. While it’s easy to just turn your head, and and not forgive those who have done wrong to you, would you want your Heavenly Father to do that to you?

Mothers. This is definitely a book based on mothers. Lily struggles with so much in this book with her mom. Her mom died when she was young and Lily is constantly searching for love. When your mom leaves you or when you die, you are constantly going to be searching for that void inside. Many emotions probably arise from this, and in Lily’s case there’s a complete love/hate relationship with her dead mom. I know that the way that Lily has been effected by her mom’s death can be the same for children who’s mom left them behind….. moved on with their life. Selfishness. Those kids will always have a love and hate relationship with the memory of their mother. Yearning for her love and hating her for what she did to them.

Dealing with our problems. Dealing with our emotions. We all have ways in our life that we deal with our problems. Some people write about them, some people try to ignore them, sometimes we turn to our Heavenly Father. In this book there was a wailing wall, where you write it out on a paper and stuff it into the wall of rocks. Whatever is on your mind, you just write it out and stuff it in there and be done with it. I wish that problems could be that easy, but it did make me think of lists. Weird, I know. I thought how when something’s bugging me I should just keep a journal with me, and write it there. It’s not there to completely forget, but it’s a list of things that I need to take care of, either within myself, or something that literally needs to be done. It’s not good to keep things boggled up, and if you can write it down and get it off your mind it could help. So, instead of a wailing wall, I think I might incorporate a wailing book into my life. I have issues with dealing with the things that are on my mind, I let things bog me down.

These are the feelings that I felt while reading this. These are the things I would’ve talked about at our book club had I gone this month. My next book that I will be reading is Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen. I’m anxious to start it and have read great reviews about it.

What our FHE taught me

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On Sunday I woke up and I really thought that it was going to be a great Sunday! We all had our church clothes laid out and then the unexpected (well, I should have expected it) happened. Gino asked if he’d like me to keep Ella with him. This threw me! THREW ME for a loop. I didn’t flip, and I just said, “No, thanks, but she’s going to nursery this Sunday.” The kids and I proceeded to get ready and we went to church. Okay… I know, I wouldn’t walk out the door that easily w/out saying something horribly harsh and stabbing. So, luckily I had Gino to start me off by saying to me, “I’ll pray for you today.” I turned around and said, “Hmmm…. I’ll pray for you and ask for your name to be taken off the rolls of the church so you can join Satan’s church.”

Wow.

Did I REALLY say that? YUP. I most certainly did, and felt like bawling all the way to church. I’ve been so confused as to why Gino is going backwards when all I want to do is make it to the temple and get sealed.

I walked into church and of course the bishop’s wife who has that motherly touch was right there and hugged me and….. I LOST IT! I started bawling and couldn’t stop. Then I went to the bathroom, got myself together then my friend Kari came to sit by me and I lost it again. I mean, the tears were FLOWING! It was horrible. It was a momentous day, the first day Ella went to nursery and I was sad that Gino wasn’t going to be there for it. I had many emotions that day, and I felt beyond emotional.

So, Bishop and I talked and I’m not going to be in primary anymore. I didn’t have to ask, but when I told him that I think it’s my calling that’s keeping Gino from coming to church he said he’d take care of it. I wanted to be in primary so badly. I loved being in there with Jayden, and I just might sneak in and hang out in there after Sunday school.

I have to do what’s best for my family, and if Gino’s not ready for me to leave him for the last 2 hours of church by himself, then I have to put his needs first. I feel good. I came home and we had a great talk and I think that he’ll be at church on Sunday. I hope he is.

This is an example of where I need to try to Be like Jesus. Just like our Family Home Evening lesson LAST NIGHT. I need to be compassionate of Gino’s feelings, be patient with his journey, and understanding. I also need to put him first. Right now, he’s got to be feeling somewhat insecure, because this is really all new to him. I may have been active now for a year, but Gino’s just really starting out here. There’s so much to learn and instead of feeling pressures, that’s exactly what he should be doing. If there’s a Sunday where he doesn’t want to go to church I need to be understanding and not push. Not get mad, but love him even more for the progress that he’s already made. The hard steps of changing his life because he loves us that much.