I’m taking a writing class {English Comp} this term and am extremely blessed to have a professor that lets us choose what we write about. The assignment was no less than 150 words, but no more than 250 on a vividly capture of a poignant moment or experience in the life of the author, using a show not tell method.

Let me just start out by saying writing no more than 250 words on a subject coming straight from my heart was difficult. I’m almost wondering if I should have chosen this subject to write about for my longer paper ~ 500-750 words.

So, here it is ~ I’ll be submitting it in tonight so any feedback is GREATLY appreciated 🙂

I emerged out of the shower to see that stick sitting on the counter. That stick that was bound to heal my broken heart, it just had to. Looking down and seeing those 2 beautiful pink lines made my heart skip a beat.

It had only been two months since the agonizing news I had received at the doctors. “I’m sorry, there’s no heart beat. I’ll give you a moment to call somebody and then we’ll need to make arrangements.” Two short, agonizing months of having moments of not being able to breathe, not being able to fathom how I am not feeling my little girl kick away inside of me, of blaming God.

Those two beautiful pink lines stared back at me like a deer caught in headlights, or maybe it was me staring at them that way. Did I replace her? Am I wrong? Is God just making this tragedy better? These were only a few of the galloping thoughts going through my mind.

There were moments of feeling this tingly excitement surging through my body, only to have guilt wash over not even 10 minutes later. Feelings changing like clockwork just as the day turns into night. It was my own personal rollercoaster of a grieving mom; my own personal roller coaster of a thankful mom.

When the doctors placed my baby girl into my arms, a feeling of understanding came over me. I learned at that moment that everything in this life happens for a reason.